How often have you said, “Who am I now?”

It’s a common theme in widowhood.

We want to find ourselves again… but we don’t want to leave him behind.

I offer this, though ⬇️

If I could sit beside myself with kindness, what would I notice about who I am becoming in this grief journey?

Can I be honest?
I’ve been chasing the Gina who walked with her partner.

She knew who she was, and her identity felt grounded.

Now, on shaky ground, I’ve heard her say gently:

“You don’t need me anymore, Gina… I got you here. But now it’s time for you to walk with the parts of you that I couldn’t carry forward.” ⬇️

But I protested… I do need you 😭💔😢❤️

She said, “I’m part of you… always. You’re not betraying me by walking with this grief. You’re honoring me by living.

We are with you. Lew and I…”

😭😭😭 With tears streaming down my face, I got up from the floor and looked in the mirror—my grey hair seeping through, lip lines and crow’s feet abound (lol).

But one thing I noticed… my eyes.

The hazel muted lightness in my eyes was starting to come back… just a bit.

I stood.

And I encourage you—admire who you are.

With wrinkles and the beauty that surrounds us… we remain.

Even if we feel lost and uncertain… we remain. 🌱

May God shine upon you today and make His face shine on you again.

Let your beautiful grief allow you to SEE you.

Hugs,

Gina