If I had known…
that loving him
would mean losing him…
would I have loved him anyway?
…
Yes, of course I would, 100%
Because the love
Our love was worth it all.

That younger version of me…
she didn’t know what life would bring.
She was carefree.
She chose to love.
She chose to live.

Did she know love carried risk?
Of course.
But she never thought it would come to this…

And still—
she chose a full life. Was she naive? Or Careless? Of course not, she was living and loving her life and his, and that mattered.

There’s this version of me.
The one who knows how the story ends.

Would I go back and tell her to walk away?

Now, even knowing the ending?

No, I would tell her to choose him every day…

Because when I look at our story…

I see something we get to choose:
We can call this the most tragic of love stories.. and stay there.
or the greatest love story ever written.

Yes—this was tragic. 100%
Life IS love and tragedy, mixed together. We never thought it would be us though.

But if I choose to see this as the greatest love story…
then I choose to walk with this grief and still live.
I live differently now…

but I still live.
I choose love over fear.
I choose to honor him.
I choose to keep going.

Does it mean that I forget the sorrow or the grief? No… It comes with me, but I believe that if I choose to live, it will shape this story of love and loss.

Do I hate being a widow?
Yes. 100%.
Do I wish this wasn’t my story?
Absolutely.

But I wouldn’t trade a single day I had with him.
He changed me.
He expanded me.
He showed me a life I didn’t even know how to see…He was my gift!
A life where EVERY day is a holiday
and EVERY meal is a banquet. The SEVEY motto lived out!

And my friend…
I know you miss him.
Just like I miss my Lew. Words can’t even express how much we miss them.

I know you wish too, that this wasn’t part of your story.

There will come a moment, when you will make a choice to see the two versions of your love story.

BUT, I want you to remember this is my story, so you don’t have to land here just yet, I offer this story of hope to you. If you are newly widowed, this is a space for you to be held by others who are walking before you.

He will forever be the love of my life.
The Father of my children and the Pop of my sweet Judah bug.
He will be the reason I laugh at certain things, because of his laugh.
He will be the reason a song transports me to another time and place.
He IS the reason that I am choosing to stand again and to see the love story as beautifully lived out.

What I have learned is that our love story is meant to share with the world and so is yours.

He was the greatest love story of your life!! The world should know.

Our widowhood isn’t the end of us! It’s a love story worth telling and it’s a love story worth continuing to walk with.

We weren’t meant to live
in the tragic version of our love story forever.

We got to love.
And even without knowing the ending…
we would have never changed a single second of it.

If something in this spoke to your heart…
and you feel ready for a deeper kind of support…
I’ve created a few gentle next steps for you.
The Gentle Grief Guide is a soft place to land—
something you can return to on the days that feel heavy.

The New Way to Stand is for the moment
you begin to feel ready to find your footing again…
to live in a way that honors both your love and your loss.
And if you’re desiring something more personal…
more held…I am starting a new round of this starting at the end of this month.

I do offer one-on-one support.
A space where you can be held with grace and find you again.
where your grief is met with understanding,
and where we walk through this together.

There’s no pressure to choose anything.
Only an invitation to take the next step that feels right for you.
You’ll know if and when you’re ready

PS.  Our meetings for Grief And Me are on Thursdays at 3 PM PST time zone, the link is below!! I can’t wait to meet you